BARBIE TEE’s Diary | Exotic Life And Times Of Ms. WakaWaka – Week 2

Whoop! Whoop! Scream hello to your one and only beautiful Miss WakaWaka of Nigeria and melt as I give you my Barbie Tee’s eyelashes and wave my fingers right back at you… I am a celebrity already; don’t act like you don’t know.

And before I continue, I want to dedicate this paragraph to all my readers and fans out there! I posted my HOT DEBUT last week and I am so excited to inform you that it is still ranking as the Top Post on #MikellzBluez… you guys really rock, and I appreciate how madly you are feeling your girl! So, get the word out and bring more of your friends to have their share of this madness, and before you know it; we shall take over the world!

‘Oyinbo’ plenty much, I had these people wondering if I am still the Ms. WakaWaka they want to read from; no fear, na still me! This life wey we dey na real theatre oh; eyes dey see and wonders dey happen! Yoruba people talk say if you never waka well well, you no go see squirrel wey get hunchback; but as for me, Miss WakaWaka of Nigeria aka Miss Ajala aka Binoculars, I don see pass that one oh!

I thought the incident with Alhaji was small, not knowing that the one I was about to experience would be bigger. Na so the car reverse and stop beside me, and as a sharp girl, I quickly pushed out my chest to display my assets and put on a seductive smile. I leaned forward to say hi, and the guy behind the wheels turned out to be a guy that looked rather young (but who cares about age? I think I already made it clear that the only relevant number is the amount of money I am collecting from you). However, if one is to judge by this guy’s dressing, you will never think that the car belongs to him.

He just smiled and said “how are you?” with a very strong Ibo accent. He asked me where I was going to and I told him. He offered to give me a ride and I got into the car (free ride, no dulling; or do I look like Ab-dull?) and he sped off.

He introduced himself as John and I told him my name was Barbie Tee and kept the Ms. WakaWaka of Nigeria in hibernation — he may not be able to swallow the gist. As we moved on, I noticed that his Nokia ‘Torch’ phone was ringing but he didn't pick; and I simply thought that he was probably just obeying traffic rules….

But come to think of it; why will a guy driving a Nissan Murano be girded in low quality clothes and also be using a cheap Nokia phone? Something is definitely not right somewhere. Well, they usually say “no be everything wey dey shine be gold” — the guy fit be perfect example of ‘money miss road’ and he doesn’t know how to spend his money. And if that was the case; I decided I was going to help him spend it well well.

We got to a filling station and he drove in, and then told me he wanted to buy fuel in a keg. There was a little queue, so he just parked the car and went to join the queue with a keg that he brought out of from the booth.

His phone started ringing again, and because he wasn’t in the car, I decided to peep to look at who was calling — you know I am super restless; it might be one of his many girls calling him. I looked at the screen and I saw “Oga Madam calling…” and was like: Oga Madam bawo? I knew I had to pick up the call and when I did, I got the biggest shock of my life….

A woman’s voice came on immediately I picked the call, shouting, “Johnny! Johnny! Just because I gave you my car to go and buy fuel for the gen, you are taking longer than usual … I will report you to my husband when he comes back! And if you are not careful, I will send you back to your village, you this useless houseboy!” And gbam! The line went dead.

The woman must have thought that it was Johnny who picked her call. Johnny, the houseboy… see my life; I don finish! So, na houseboy I dey try seduce since, eh? I have suffered in this my wakawaka, I swear. But I have to teach Johnny a lesson he will never forget. He is indeed a useless boy to think he could fool me with what wasn’t his… by the time I am finish with him, he will share his story to every wannabe guys out there to swallow only what they can chew.

I snapped out of my thoughts as soon as I caught a glimpse of John’s image moving towards the car. I quickly pretended like I had seen nothing and directed my thoughts into finalizing my wicked plan for the guy…

And I promise that you won’t miss any of the action when you come back next week…. Till then, I remain Miss WakaWaka.

Some Fans are asking if I am Tonto Dikeh... iWish!
I am Barbie Tee joor!

Barbie Tee