There’s into you, and then there’s
head-over-heels gaga. These little things tip a man over that edge.
It’s a baffling question: Is there some
specific moment or event that makes a guy suddenly decide “Yes, I think I love
her”? Well, the answer isn’t clear-cut, but there are some general principles.
“Men have certain innate needs that must
be met before they truly feel connected to you,” says Paul Dobransky, MD, author of The
Secret Psychology of How We Fall in Love. “When a guy realizes, consciously or not, that you’re ideal on all these
levels, that’s when he’ll commit.” Boiled down, guys have four primal
relationship desires that are sometimes sated by the tiniest of moves by you.
Here, experts continue with the PART 2
(click
HERE for the PART 1) of this very helpful article, so you can put these
insights to use when your guy is at the brink.
The
Desire: To Shine
Maybe he’s cocky, but he’s still
insecure. Trust us, guys need to know that they’re respected and appreciated.
“When being around you increases a guy’s esteem, both internally and in the
eyes of others, he’ll naturally want to be attached to you,” says Dr.
Dobransky. Here, things that show your high value and nudge him toward love.
Make
him happier. Laugh when one of you loses balance during sex.
Go to stupid movies. Drag him out when he’s crabby. If you can keep things
light, even during stressful times, you’ll become indispensable.
Be
a social butterfly. Guys are good at left-brain stuff,
like sales and sports, but can get awkward when it comes to social graces. Take
the lead and charm the people you meet and he’ll be extra grateful to have you.
But he may take credit for making those new friends...whatever.
Play
mind games. Activities that require mental prowess — like
Scrabble, puzzles, and chess — can prod his passion. It sounds nuts, but proof
of your problem-solving abilities subconsciously shows him you’re a desirable
choice for carrying on his genes.
Act
like the grand prize. Seeing you through other people’s eyes
reminds him how special you are. Invite him to an event where you’ll excel
(whether it’s karaoke or a fun run), or have him stand between you and another
man you think is getting too close at a bar.
The
Desire: Comfort
“Falling in love is a process of
developing attachment, which happens when oxytocin floods the brain,” says Alan
Hirsch, MD, neurological director of the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research
Foundation. You can unleash those love hormones by making him feel like you two
just “fit.” When he’s so comfortable with you that he stops thinking about your
relationship and simply enjoys it, he’ll find himself nudged into love
territory. Take these tips.
Let
him see you primp. Grooming in front of him enhances intimacy
because it’s something other guys don’t get to witness. Just keep it
goddesslike (applying lipstick or powder), not gross (bleaching your
moustache).
Cook
together.
Being around food spikes oxytocin levels in males. The more often you prep
dinner à deux, the more he’ll associate you with the good feelings he gets from
eating it.
Stock
your pad.
When buying groceries you don’t have a preference on, get a brand he uses.
He’ll subconsciously feel at home at your place. Sleep with him. Catnap near
him or let yourself doze off in his arms so he sees you in your most trusting,
completely relaxed state.
What
Yanks Him Back from the Brink
Some factors can derail a guy who’s
about to fall.
1)
They Get a New Opportunity
A promotion often means spending more
hours at work or taking a schedule-chewing class. Instead of balancing that with
their love lives, guys tend to prioritize their careers and believe that a
solid relationship will endure the delay. So if something big is brewing, he
may hold himself back.
2)
You Never Fight
Sure, guys hate arguing, but it’s
worse if you don’t react negatively at all when he’s screwed up. A guy will
worry that (a) you’re going to lash out later, (b) you’re a doormat, or (c) you’re
not into him enough to care. Any of these will make him rethink your budding
relationship.
3)
Pure Panic
Many men worry that if they commit,
they’ll have to give something up—friends,
dart night, something. So when a guy realizes he’s fallen for you, he may freak
out and pull away for a while. If you can weather his big-baby behaviour without
reacting in a way that confirms those fears, he should snap out of it.
[source: cosmopolitan.com]
*****************
Do YOU write relationship
articles? Let us publish them on #MikellzBluez
and show the world the talent you are
blessed with. Send your articles to mikellzbluez@gmail.com
**********
WE
LOVE COMMENTS
WE
want to read from you as well … kindly post your opinions, suggestions,
love, praise, criticism, thoughts and all you feel about this post and #MikellzBluez as a blog in the Facebook (mobile view only) and Blog Comment Boxes … thanks!
No comments:
Post a Comment