[CRAZY ME] GOODBYE TO 2013 | MY 2014 CRAZY RESOLUTIONS

Oh yes! It seemed like I would never write this piece… but fhuck it, everyone already did their version, and I can act the ‘best that is being saved for the last’ and give you this crazy shit in the last hours of the year!

Yes! Glory be to God; now you can say you are reading the “cast and production crew list” for the very long movie called 2013 and some quick trailers to what to expect as the big blockbusting movie 2014 begins! So many actions, romance, tragedies, adventures, horrors and comedies in 2013… you can only hope for more intriguing, seat grabbing and suspense-filled scenes in 2014. And through it all, I hope we make it to see 2015, the movie after 2014!

2013 HIGHLIGHTS

The first major thing that happened which meant so much to me is nothing but #MikellzBluez! Started writing these sequels since 2011 via Facebook Notes and Damilola Adegoke, a die-hard fan, said I should put up a Blog instead of Facebook Notes. With so much reluctance and laziness, I posted the first five episodes on Blogger and added some poems to the five on WordPress… but no one read them, and it was even stressful to get the outlook and delivery I actually wanted. And you know what; I dropped it. But like I said, “all glory being God’s”, I picked up my crappy laptop and went back to writing mid-September, 2013… and yeah, the rebirth of #MikellzBluez. And for a no-news/gossip blog like #MikellzBluez, I am proud to tell you that we can boast of 100,000+—yes, a hundred thousand and counting—page views in three months! And this is the point I have to thank everyone supporting this blog spiritually, mentally, financially and twitterfeed-ually… a big end of the year “thank you” to all #MikellzBluez twitterfeed accounts on Twitter and Facebook; you guys are the best!

Alright, 2013 is the year I said my final bye to my long beloved Symbian OS and it is no doubt that I fhucking miss it. Yes, I started with the best Android device available at the moment… and trust me, we gon rock this shit together till we can use it to call the Holy Spirit.

Some major funny and crazy moments on Instagram this year… follow iidiggz to see what I’m talking about. Twitter was fun as well… but none took my time eventually like Blogger; learning never stops.

Lots of friends were made online but few only made it to the offline mode. Just like money and puzzy, we all know that friends also come and go, but through it all, I gave no room for backstabbing and all those online drama. And as much as I could, I kept my offline friendships intact; I didn’t lose any, instead I added to the list.

2013 wasn’t much of a year of relationships for me… I stopped watching the few “Tangle” movies I had and opted for the “No Strings Attached” motion pictures—it feels good to be in love and also be free joor. Who even said we must all be so serious before? Fhuck that shit! I had me some Medusa and Cleopatra… 2013 was fun when it comes to Mikell and Women.

Universally, 2013 is the year that BBM started running on Android and iOS devices. BB10 stormed out, Android kept adding decimal values to their 4.0 upgrade and iOS shook the world with iOS7. We lost the great leader Nelson Mandela and exceptional actor Paul Walker… and former governor Olusegun Agagu died twice. Kendrick Lamar reignited the hip-hop game, Snoop Dogg aka Snoop Lion gave us some reincarnated reggae smokes and Miley Cyrus took on a crazy sexy movement… while Kanye West gave the world North West! And how can I tell you some real major shits that happened in 2013 without telling you that Arsenal FC is rounding the year up by comfortable sitting at the top of the English Premier League table? Yes, WE are there… like we have been since forever!

On the national scene, 2013 is the year of “My Oga At The Top” and no one still knows the website for “nscdc”, OBJ wrote a letter to GEJ like the J they have in common wasn’t enough and also got one from his daughter, ASUU called off a six-month strike and health workers started theirs the next day… wait, did I say the FG gave ASUU an ultimatum—an epic bluff? Well, there was a faceoff between the First Lady and Wole Soyinka, and we lost some real gems namely Goldie Harvey, Father U-Turn, Fatai Rolling Dollar, and Justus Esiri… may their souls continue to rest in peace. TuFace, Peter Okoye, Dr Sid and Tiwa Savage did their marriages. Still this same year, Miss UNIZIK (the AdaAda girl) and Maheeda (a supposed gospel artiste) had their nudes on almost every mobile device in the country… while Miss Kedike claimed to be enjoying the publicity from a sex-tape released in her name. And wait… Olamide made 2013 the year of the “Gunman Pose”!

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Happy New Year!

Yesterday was last year

Thanks to God—I’m here

Popping champaya—Cheers!

It is a year

Lost some that were dear

Some good ones disappeared

But I’m glad to have you here!

To my family, friends and fans everywhere

An ultimate prayer I want to share

That we are sane and safely there

Till the end of—and beyond—this year….

I love you…

Mikell Olabiyi © 2012 Happy New Year

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Everybody is shouting, every phones calling or ringing, millions of calls are jamming, plenty sms hanging, and networks are crashing…. The president dancing, senators jumping, honourables laughing, governors and chairmen clapping, the first lady bombing grammatically…. Everybody rejoicing, bottles are counting, red lights blazing, music blasting, top of the moment feeling all over, and Bokos remain a threat to bomb it all away… How about that for an intro to the year 2014…?

Happy New Year! We are all shouting it but are we really happy…? What are the differences between yesterday and today except for dates? Someone said Nigerians have endured so many sufferings that they’ve developed hard skin (just like the ants are now used to insecticides); does that also fall into the ‘evolution’ or is it ‘mutation’ category? I guess my first resolution is not to allow anything to make me unhappy again—not even you can try…. Oops! FIRST RESOLUTION for the year is to MOVE closer to GOD! Well, my only problem is that He is in Heaven; how closer can I get when I’m still on this earth…?

Happy New Year…but I don’t think your president and governors want you to be happy! It is going to be an election or a pre-election year and I think all they are concerned about now are their pockets, family, and parties! ASUU went on strike for six months like no man’s business, health workers go on strike and the health of the masses was left in the hands of God, and it is not like Nigeria is a financially poor country…. For a better Nigeria, I have a resolution to join any positive movement that is ready to combat all the selfish politicians and government officials, be it Bokos or MEND….

And I know that you are all concerned about my sex life in the 2013—you have terrible ideas (or can you prove that you have fact(s)?) that I’ve not been faithful to my lover(s)—Jesus loves me too, don’t you know? Well, my next resolution is a wish! Just like wishing that the NPF will be reliable to do as they ought to, that the President and every other government officials should cease being selfish, that MTN should crash call tariff to 1k/sec, that Patience Jonathan speaks correct English, and that Nicki Minaj fall in love with me… I wish I should be able to stay away from girls in 2014.

My other resolutions are making targets to improve in some of the things I do… Like drinking better (I should target finishing two bottles of Ciroc on a sitting), staying further away from smokes (not to talk of holding a cigar), shitting better (the number of times I do that should go from 20 to 45—prices are getting more than 100% increase too), fhucking better (I should be able to satisfy 10 ladies at the same time very soon, though 8 ladies at once isn’t a bad stunt for now), and writing crazier stuffs to make you wet and soil your pants (getting you to fart is NOT enough)!

A Year to LOVE more...

These are the resolutions for 2014 AD, according to Mikell 3F Diggz… as he welcomes you to 2014.

#Cwaziest