Happy
New Year!!!
Will we ever
stop saying that line? Don’t mind me; I am also excited jare… 2014 shall be our
year to move from greatness to greater greatness! Alright, it is a new year and
I am feeling good; you can guess I am feeling too good for me to think the next
thing to do is drop a list—a list, of all things—of my Twitter sweethearts…
like: who actually gives a flying fhuck? Shut up! I know you give a massive b.job—very
close to fhuck—otherwise you won’t be here. And even if you don’t give
anything, I am here and I am doing my thing, on my page, with my madness, and I
love it… mind of a wanker or a wack
Naija singer—your choice.
Too much
story; let us get to the major shit we are here to dig out. Here is a list of
women that took it to the next level to reach out of the Twitter timeline to
touch—and almost touch—me physically. This is no fiction and with no
intention to badmouth anyone… as a matter of fact, you hypocrites ain’t
getting no handles to talk about, but if you can catch up with the
names, then you are a certified stalker.
First of
all, be informed I regard whoever does something sweet (like giving
shout-outs, posting feeds for #MikellzBluez
or mentioning me with some very sweet words) as “sweethearts” on my Twitter Timelines, and I have hundreds of them….
But these are the very top 10 out of all that took extra steps off the
timelines and DMs to make one impact or the other in my life.
3
… 2 … 1
*drum
rolls*
Her handle
is very close to her name and she is one of the coolest tweeps that I’ve ever interacted with. Super mature and much coded…
it took me a break away to decipher all her signals but getting back together
appeared to be forced. And with the fact that #MikellzBluez seems to contain my true life sexpisodes even
if the girls keep anonymous identities, she just ran away, hoping not to
feature in one of the sequels. Well, she just got featured…. *evil grin*
9
— Olayinka
A very funny
time I had with her, but there is no way you will get the jokes, even if I tell
you. As crazy as we were supposed to be together, I didn’t just flow well with
her… nevertheless, she kept being real and sweet to me, like my chick for life.
Placing her ninth is to tell her thanks for her love I never received.
8
— Adunni
That is my special
name for her. Telling you her real name is almost like dropping her handle; she
is one of those popular beauties on Twitter… even though we weren’t so popular
together, those who knew we had something going on are still handful. Very
crazy, engaging and loving, she remains one of the best companies I’ve had… and
yes, a sequel about my time with her will come on #MikellzBluez anytime soon—she personally requested for it.
7
— Kemi
I met like
100 Kemis via Twitter last year… I wonder if that is not the highest used name
for females in the Yoruba-dom. And
yes, I met this sweet girl that came in like a crushing ball—and later, a
wrecking ball. One of the realest but most confused women I have ever interacted
with… I actually dedicated a poem to her confusion. She was nice and special…
but I couldn’t just deal with her super level of confusion of choices.
6
— Ruth
Are you
looking for that very crazy and sexy sweetheart, who can keep your horns
blaring? Just find yourself on the right side of Ruth and you are so blessed.
She is so sweet, I can eat her now and later… and forever. Super real and if
she gives a flying fhuck, she is definitely stunting on the bed. In this 2014, we shall make a blockbusting
movie… watch out!
5
— Tosin
No long
thing… do your horns need fixing or oiling, boy? I met a mechanic—or is it a
“rewire”—who fixed my horns with no strings attached; her name is Tosin. My
brief time with her was so sweet and unforgettable—yes, I keep a memorable video….
4
— Ife
No, not the
one from the “My Dark Days With Ife”
sequels, this is actually a sweetheart next door that I never knocked on her
door till the last few days of the year for her to make this list. She’s been
sweet to me through the year though, but she took it to another level of
sweetness in the last hours of 2013… something to dig more into, in 2014.
3
— Jumoke
“Started
from a mention, now we are here” the first real girl to mention me as her ‘crush’
and had us crushing afterwards… no, many had been in my DM to confess crushing,
but this beautiful sweetheart was the first to be crazy enough to blow it in my
face—boom! Never gets tired of talking and playing, Jumoke is one of those
girls that can actually kill for you if she loves you… but Diggz just took an overdose of love immunization when they met.
Guess you can guess the end of the romantic story… okbye.
2
— Kemi
And then,
Mr. Mikell 3F Diggz fell in love
with this very beautiful girl… and her name is Kemi. How do you describe
someone you are in love with? Real life shits… guess love is—was—a beautiful
thing, sounds like something Selana
and Justin must’ve said, right?
1
— Tosin
Very sweet
and being one of the people I still thank God for pushing towards me in 2013,
Tosin, who had worked with me on my magazine when I was in the university,
reconnected to me via Twitter in 2013 to be my largest online contributor in 2013. If you are still wondering who is
behind Barbie Tee’s Diary, the very
hilarious and crazy life and times of
Ms. WakaWaka; this very creative sweetheart is working all the magic… and I
so fhucking love her! Many ideas rushing at the moment… expect more xxxplosive
delivery from this lady in 2014.
Have a crazy
year ahead!
#Cwaziest
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