#MBz09 - Sister Tola; My TOTOrial Master IV

…What worse can happen to a Youth Corper in the middle of an unprotected popo with a village girl and the girl asked: “…Hope you don't have AIDS…?” and the boy said “NO”, only for the girl to say, “…Thank God; because I don't want to catch that thing again!”? (…that goes to all of you that can't do without sugar; sweet things do also kill…seriously!)

My Bank Manager was confused with his mathematics, so he called his secretary to assist him, “I have $217,000…what will you take off to get 25%?” and she replied, “…If I must confess sir, I will take off my blouse, my skirt, my bra, and even my thong…that’s hell of a cheddar” (don't tell me this planet still has women with only money running in their brains…or am I lost? What planet is this?)

The girl sitting opposite me couldn’t take her eyes off me, so the girl next to me had to help her out — she gave her eyes a good rain of pepper-spray! And before anyone could stomach what happened, the girl opposite gave the girl beside me a phantom face wipe! All I felt on my cheek and my shirt were spurts of red liquid — she must have had the fingers of a witch — the victim was instantly cursed with Tribal Marks! Don't be alarmed for me; the girls must have been sworn enemies or something because I don't know any of them and will never know the cause of their fight…. So, I'm here with the final flexpisode with Sister Tola.

Like I said, it was a revelation that cold night in the common room and thus, the Genesis to my Exodus of Training! First lesson was to ensure good Judges by making high Numbers of strong strokes; so that when I meet Deborah, Ruth and Esther, they will definitely sing The Song of Songs to Tunde, IK, Samuel, Titus, Joshua and Amos to relay the Chroniclez and Acts of my Longthing! (Don't forget she was a Christian Sister and we had to be biblical with everything we did!)

2nd lesson I remembered she taught me was the ability to be active anywhere — classroom, field, pool board, bathroom, in-door, out-door, in-car, in-pool … did I say anywhere? Now, I'm simply Thuraya! (I don't like MTN, otherwise I should be MTN; everywhere you go.)

The spark at that time was that there was another girl at the side while my main girlfriend was on board as well. (How I wished the girls loved each other enough for us to enjoy four-some). So, keeping up with my TOTOrials was a little challenging but this girl wouldn’t have it — she would always hook me at the slightest opportunity and wash off every little 'vanilla' left in my system!

Sister Tola (toh badt gannn!) actually washed me so much that I lost my colour! Whenever she got hold of me, she would change the soap water like 8 times consecutively. This went on for some days that everyone started to notice how faded I looked! And after 3 weeks, I was as pale as HIV — all from a Christian sister? (I guess it’s natural for you to come out in beast mode if you were caged for long or how will you explain Sister Tola being a life-taken freak?!)

And just like the Corper in the first paragraph, I kept taking the sugar; not acknowledging that diabetes does kill. But the greatest thanks to my very good friend — Amama!

So, like every morning routine after my roommates left for class, the soap water had been disposed for the 6th time. Then I staggered to ma friends’ room to ask for extra CD (you can't imagine the record we was waxing that morning…) and they all screamed like they saw a ghost but still had to give me the CD I requested…

Back in the room, Sister Tola started playing Police and Thief with me, where she was the police stopping and searching the thief (Me)…. And you should know how the search usually ended — she would find a BIG gun in my trousers and the rest would be story (so much popo creativity for a Sister!)…. But the story had to end right there that morning — Amama decided that. He came banging on my door like a mad man every single time Sister Tola discovered the gun, so we had to restart the game … till the final time he decided not to go until Sister Tola left!

…And Glory is to God; that was the last day Sister Tola fellow-shipped with me! And I later made a confession to my girlfriend then (remember I said I was supposed to be a better man, but girls didn't let me be). However that was the last time washing got me faded — my taste for laundry centers had since been super high (Guess good effs don't fade…) and my authenticity have been upgraded to 100000%; Yes — 100000%! So, no matter how much you love washing, it is your machine that will wreck because I now have auto-revitalization in my system — don't try! *winks*

… Mikell'z Bluez Continuez…

#MBz09 © 2013

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