THE FINAL SHOWDOWN! #MBz31 Sadiq’s Thirst For My LOLLYPOP — Part IV

“She says she likes my lolli and she gon make it pop…” get the keyword: SHE. So, what is with all these HEs trying to pop my lolly? I am even tired of writing about these sick bunch of men, so I am rounding this story up today… it is Christmas season and I don’t you to miss my Christmas Cruise!

So, I hope you understand the whole scenario perfectly… if you are just joining us in this class, I will advise you collect notes from previous lectures [Part I, Part II and Part III] so you can catch up with whatever we are talking about here.

Okay, I and Amama had been dreaming about eight hundred thousand dollars and our Hummer Jeeps, which would surely be topping the lists of immediate expenses… and more seriously, we were having conversations about investing and planning how to be reserved with the huge sum of money and all. Many times, I would just get to my hostel’s gate and picture my Hummer parked at a corner and enjoy all the instant shower of attention that would be on me as I walk to the monster vehicle… oh, please stop this shit!

the mental picture of 800,000USD

And all was fine and dandy till Sadiq came back to inform me that we were required to start rehearsals, as the movie makers would soon be in the country and they wouldn’t want any unprofessional delay from the casts. I am aware that they write some introductory scripts for some of these ‘blue films’… but rehearsals? Private rehearsals for that matter! If it was a guy that gave this package to a girl, she might swallow it, just like I wouldn’t have had any problem if it was a girl that said the same thing.

However, this was a grown ass man telling me that we needed to rehearse a men-only movie… mission impossible! I told him that I didn’t have any problem with acting, since I had some stage performance experience and my mobile device was sure filled with s-rated video clips… I would give them the perfect voice needed for the movie when it was time to shoot. “Shebi my own is just to make sounds while a guy sucks the marrow out of my bone; no wahala naw — my voice is so good, my girls catch multiple org**ms on the phone when we have phone s*x.” I told Sadiq.

I relayed Sadiq’s information to Amama as soon as Sadiq left. Amama exclaimed, “Say what?! Both the rehearsals and acting will not happen till I have my 800K!” I told him what I told Sadiq and we both agreed that there would be nothing like rehearsals… however, we kept dreaming about Hummer Jeeps — it was real.

The next time I saw Sadiq, he was all not meeting me in the room when he came to visit me and all… and that he even planned staying a night at my place. In my mind, I was like: “Spending the night in my room? I hope I would wake up eight hundred thousand dollars richer in the morning though.” Tell you what: I was all about the money that I didn’t see that Sadiq was plotting a dangerous attack for my behind.

I asked him about his cousin and the movie makers, but he told me that they were not yet in the country… I am sure he would have been thinking “see thief wan collect eight hundred thousand dollars; bring your bumbum here, let me popo it joor.” And before he left, he still mentioned that we needed to have rehearsals, just as they required.

The Rehearsal ... No, The Idea

Maybe he hoped that I was bipolar or I wouldn’t mind experimenting shits, and would call on him for the rehearsals (as he had successfully created an open opportunity for both of us to do shits with no strings attached — how creative?), but when he didn’t receive any message from me, he thought he had to reassure me of the whole movie package, as that seemed to be the only reason I was conversing with him. And he came with some forms that I would fill, to register as cast for the coming movie… but he added a warning that filling the form meant agreeing to the private rehearsals condition.

Oh! The desperate guy just played his last card, and it sure had me in a tight corner… but not too tight to imagine the eyesore of another man licking my chocolate. What did I do? I didn’t wait for five minutes, an hour, half a day, a day, a week or a month to reply him… I told him in less than two minutes, “The only thing that would motivate my spirit and make me blind to the fact that a man is kissing my balls is the eight hundred thousand dollars — if that money is not around; sorry, I can’t do shit!”

"Can Mikell Just Pull Down His Shorts Already? Arrrgghhh!"

No, that wasn’t his last move; this guy didn’t stop but insisted spending the night at my place… since he came late. No wahala naw, it seemed his mission wasn’t different from a guy that wants to eat a cat by all means, so I allowed him stay the night… then it got interesting.

He said he wanted to shower, but wouldn’t use the hostel’s usually smelly bathrooms. It was late into the night, so we went to the tap section, fetched water and this guy got buck naked to shower. Having done enough “Cele’s iwe odo” at my younger age, male nudity is actually nothing to me, so I didn’t even pay any attention. Then he asked me to shower as well, but I declined politely, and we went back upstairs.

Time to sleep but this guy said we won’t be able to share my bed as he was feeling awkward since we would be having ‘no rehearsals’. Rehearsals talk again? I just ignored like I heard nothing. I offered my other mattress — I kept two — but he still refused but chose to stay on the floor. I didn’t understand what he was trying to prove by his insistence to sleep on a piece of wrapper on my carpet… probably he was hoping that I would call him to the bed for some actions, that guy sure messed with the wrong dude. I slept off in no time… and I must have snored loudly, as I didn’t even meet him in the room when I woke up the next day. Rehearsals ko reversal ni.

The Movie…?

And funny enough, I did all I did with a straight mind (like: “sorry, no show if there is no money to propel it”) because I didn’t even know what his original intentions were until I met his distant cousin, Aminat, in my class. After much talk about “you know my cousin” and blah blah, she just said quietly, “Mikell, be careful with my cousin oh; he has some funny behaviors.” And when I asked her to shed more light on the “funny behaviors”, she said, “be careful, dazzall.”

Guess my “Cash before Carry” policy paid my ass in that case mehn… mothaeffer wanted to do rehearsals for a movie they are yet to shoot till date… onyoshii!

…MikellzBluez Continues…

#MBz31 © 2013

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