…You
should know that when a girl starts whining about rejection and acceptance like
a Youth Corper that desperately
needs a Primary Place of Assignment
(PPA), it pisses me off! What the flack about emotions & affections
when you sure know this is but a spur of the moment?! I'll prefer when we can
face the truth that relationships (mostly) are like Amusement Parks— play with the toys and gadgets for as long as your
ticket allows and you should effin
enjoy it while it last (No Take-Away)
because you can't take any effin
thing home! And the juice is you can always buy more tickets as long as the Park is OPEN
(so, why the worries?).
I
acknowledge that I write irritatingly when it comes to love, and you may
wonder what’s going on with my love-life but
my simple answer is NOT YOUR BIZWAGG!
Name me the New Generation Anti-Love, I don't mind… But I won't
want any girl singing Heart-Break
songs in my vicinity when it’s so obvious she has no heart!
Let
me drop my newest rhymes for you
with nutty minds:
Make
search no further
I
am the best; no other
Open
to tests; no borders
Just
spread the legs for oga
My
strikes like Thunder
And
the Ladies rain under
I
am the 9th World Wonder-
The
man with the Anaconda!
-
Mikell Olabiyi © 11.08.11
*Feeling
the encore* Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You're far too effin kind! Now, let me get on with
today's part of my first Love saga and
my first question is: hope I'm not boring you? Please, let me know, so as to
change the flow. On this episode, I'm going to chip in the spices that some voyeurs have been
expecting from the start — so, I will give you some funny shiddz that happened
within that one week of FOREVER+ETERNITY…
Enjoy!
First
was how the whole shidd started — you
definitely can't imagine how awkward I felt when one of the prettiest girls
around woke me up in the morning with a visit, just to ask me out! It was crazy
and strange (WAS and not now— it now
takes a miracle for any girl sitting next to me not to ask me out; verbally or
mentally). And to facilitate a positive response (I actually told her to meet
me later in the day for my reply— just the way girls use to say, ‘I will fink
about it…’), she bought me N1500 MTN credit THEN!!
Guess I was actually the girl then or what do you say…?
 |
| Love Terms & Conditions |
At
the beginning of a relationship (either you exchange letters of agreement and conducts
like we did or not), you are bound to discuss terms & conditions (or what will you call it?). Yeah, we
discussed some and before I could say Jack, she said, “I don't like sex; (now, the juicy clause) but if you want it, I
will give it to you”. And you know your boy was a VIRGIN in ‘love’ (…I can't
believe I was once a virgin — feels like I've been straffing all the days of my life…), so I replied, “no problem, its
okay by me— I don't even want to do anything except kissing…” (Sounds like one of
the dumbest shidd you ever heard, eh?
You can't imagine how much I slap myself anytime I call back the mental photos
of those days…)
…But
not long after we started kissing, this girl was twisting on my down and like something
out of an mojo. She grabbed
my enormous but still shy kokoro! Saw her biting her lips, so
I blurted, “sorry…but what are you doing? Thought you said ‘no popo’?!" (I
guess I've been so much of a jerk— I can't blame the girl for dropping me like
I was ‘rot’!)
Don't
get it twisted— I'm not here judging nobody, so don't get the shidd wrong with what you are about to
read! Okay, my
pal, who I'd introduced my ‘found love’ to, came up when we were chilling one
evening… He said, “…I was chilling with the guys in my department when a guy
said, ‘…dude, there’s this popo-bomb
that will kill you with cat! Ask John, Kunle, Chukz, AY, Frab, Cleo, Snoopy,
Lanre, Tayo, Musa…and…and… Yeah— Austin! She's a god-blessed killer on the mat!
Are you down?' and I was like, ‘I don't believe that…’ but five of the
mentioned names were on seat and they all nodded in agreement… So, where’s
this popo-bomb? And it was IFE!! I was like, ‘…what?! That’s
Mikell'z GF…’ and they all said, ‘Oh! Your guy don die— na wetin go kill am
be that!’” (What do you think was my reply? Don't let me tell you because
you might smash your computer or mobile on the rock…)
…Mikell’z
Bluez Continuez…
#MBz04 © 2011
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